Relay for Life
August 16 and 17, 2008
Paso Robles, CA
In rememberance of Bailey McManus
Please contact Wendi Poole (wenzplace @ yahoo .com) or Debi Silva (debrasilva @ charter. net) for more information or visit the American Cancer Society's website (www.americancancersociety.com ) and register to walk for "Team Bailey," make a donation or purchase a luminaria in Bailey's name.
Bailey June McManus
4/29/96 - 4/11/08
Bill (Poole) started this in Bailey's hospital room the day she died. I did not know. I found his rough draft in the car and asked him to finish it. That was actually on Bailey's birthday and he finished it that day.
QUIET SHADOWS ... in memory of Bailey June
The hospital is quiet. Shadows pass beneath the door.
A child's life begins this way. No one knows what lies in store.
As I sat at the foot of Bailey's bed watching and listening to what was going on around her I began to realize so much of what we do, our lives are played out in the quiet shadows of society. A child is born and the family celebrates but there is no fanfare, no press release. Just a few happy people with dreams of the future.
The family grows. The child thrives.
Her world expands and she touches lives.
As we grow our world changes. Meeting people, making friends. Searching for success and happiness. Still no one knows except for those people. It is a small world, we are content within it but it is without celebrity.
Family, teachers, so many friends... Years and memories come and go.
Time passes quickly short and sweet, but in the quiet shadows it begins to grow.
Years pass without change, but sometimes, for a few, their world is turned upside down. This event beckons attention yet there are no reporters no cameras. Just a hand full of frightened family members quietly wondering.
Soon a battle is at hand, the child fights she has no fear.
The battle is won, the war subsides. In the quiet shadows it rages near.
I have often heard about the amazing resiliency of a child but to whiteness this event in person is life changing. Why doesn't this create such a stir that many can become enlightened? I remember a time when we were New Hampshire for the Seacoast 100 mile bike ride to raise awareness for Leukemia. Several families were telling their story at a rally. I remember these kids and their parents and thinking even among their peers they seemed to suffer quietly.
Friends rally to support the family. They tell a story and creates news. Still it is received by most in passing. Bailey defeated the cancer when no doctor thought she could. This was a huge story certainly worth worldly attention. Yet there was no narrative, no chronicle.
Years have passed, Bailey has grown. her passion to live burns.
Sharing, teaching, pushing, striving
In the quiet shadows the battle returns
.
When we heard the news that Bailey was back in the hospital and the cancer had returned our hearts sank. Surely this time she would garner the attention of many and something miraculous would happen.
We hear about cancer, transplants, bone marrow so often it barely turns an ear. It is a big deal but society quietly pushes it into a place where it is comfortably hidden.
This time it is different. No one knows. Doctors, specialists have come and gone. She has no fear - No complaints or regrets.
In the quiet shadows the battle rages on.
The life of this little girl hangs in the balance - we must pay attention.
Quietly the doctors play their role. Parents pray for miracles. Bailey has become this incredibly brave young adult living in a child's body. Her vision and poise would teach all a valuable lesson. Yet only the family and close friends knows this... If this child is allowed grow surely her spiritual stature would change the world
Her spirit is grand. she never gave up. Her will is strong and fired
But alas she can fight no more. Her body is worn and tired.
I listened as a grief stricken mother asked her 11 year old daughter "what she wanted the doctors to do". She replies with no elaboration "If they can fix me I want to live... but if they can't I do not want to live like this". How could this child even understand the context and the mortality of her answer? Incredible.
Friends and family, doctors and nurses. So many concerned fill the room.
Quiet shadows as they pass her bed, the family Rabi is coming soon.
My daughter sat and watched in dismay. Crying "why aren't they doing anything"? The doctors disappear into the quiet hall ways. No last minute, heroic diagnosis. Nothing like TV - no celebrity, no over achieving, brilliant surgeon to the rescue on the 5:00 news. I must admit I was taken back by the solitude, the loneliness in the room. Everyone was living in the moment but quietly alone.
The hospital room is quiet now. Shadows pass beneath the door.
Bailey June is finally home.
Her fearless battle rages no more.
We have lost a passionate young life. She will not be forgotten. Her memory will not be lost in the quiet shadows of society. Everyone she has touched, amazed and bewildered will remember and pay it forward.
No more needles no more pain
no more helpless nights
to watch her mother quietly suffering
Bailey June lives in the thoughts of everyone who was fortunate enough to bare whiteness to her plight. Her story compels all of us to share in each others lives. To remove the shadowy Vail.
We will see her again I am sure
shining, laughing, creating
Until then Bailey lives in our hearts
In the quiet shadows... smiling... waiting
My daughter has a tattoo on her wrist * Bailey* *keep laughing*... it is an appropriate sentiment, it is what she would want... it is what she practiced.
Recycle! it was her passion.
Bill Poole 4/29/08
April 12, 2008 at 04:48 PM PDT
Bailey ALWAYS did things the right way! She had to everything PERFECT!
She passed away on April 11, 2008 at 4:11 p.m. -- 4/11 at 4:11 P.M. Unbelievable!
About an hour before her passed, she muttered "I love you," to me, to which I replied, "I love you, too my sweet angel. Take care ... it's okay, go to sleep and begin your new journey." I gently kissed her head. I asked her, "Could I have a hug?" She gave me this glare, sorta shrugged her shoulders and then reached up to me, as weak as she was ... her arms like spaghetti. The rush of emotions that went through me were like a tidal wave ... almost knocked me to the ground. Everyone in the room looked astonished.
As she lay there in bed, within her last hour or so, her breathing started to become a little more labored. She knocked off the oxygen mask and we placed it back on. While everyone in the room witnessed, after a few minutes of having the mask on, she deliberately pushed it off her face ... her hands started to get cold ... her flesh started to turn grey, and she passed. Very quiety. Very calmly. She's finally asleep and in heaven ... watching down on everyone.
We will be planning a life celebration (ONLY good/fun memories, thoughts and attidues allowed) for April 26 or April 27. We are not sure of the place or the time, or exactly what we are going to be doing. I will post more as SOON as I have the specifics.
As for Megan, she is holding up very well. We share tears, but we also try to laugh, because that is Bay would have wanted. She didn't like when we didn't get along, she's going go make SURE that Megan and I share a bond that we were unable to have while Bailey was sick.
And I have absolutely NO REGRETS because I know that I did everything in my power and beyond that I could to ensure Bailey had the best of care ... made sure she had EVERYTHING she needed or wanted while she was in the hospital ... and outside the hospital ... her precious, weak, frail little body had just had enough.
I pray everyone whose heart was ever touched by Bailey comes and shares in our celebration of her life.
Until I post ... thank you for all the support for all these years.
Bailey McManus died Friday afternoon in Los Angeles after undergoing months of treatment for a rare form of that disease. She underwent several bone marrow transplants and another round of chemotherapy.
Her cancer had been in remission for two and a half years before it returned last year.
Her friends and the community of Paso Robles helped raise money for her. One of her friends sold her pig at last year's Mid-State Fair auction to help out.
Bailey would have celebrated her 12th birthday on April 29.
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More details and info soon...
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